Death is a choice.. I would say you choose to come back..
You remind me of this guy steve.. who told me he was a psychic and his powers were limited by himself.. just cause he didn't want to kill people and such.. I told him that was nice.. but not needed he had created his own blocks in adopting reality's beliefs about morality..
I could point you to his location/place where you can talk if that would help? (this conversation we had was last week

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You don't need to control your powers.. that is a limitation you set on yourself.. why don't you trust yourself that.. you gave yourself these powers and you can use them properly? and not bring any judgment into it about if you read someone's thoughts.. cause ohh that's wrong.. or accidently killed someone.. my point is.. you don't need Control if you just allow the idea that morality doesn't serve you..