Quote:
Originally Posted by CroMagna  How do you change your inner state when the outer world is so screwed up? |
The outer world is largely reliant on your perception. It's screwed up because something inside of you is screwed up. So long as you place the blame on the world, you won't be able to take responsibility and change your experience.
I know that sounds a lot like Steve's subjective reality. I don't know what your stance on that is. What I do know is that whether it's factually sound, it presents a number of solid principles. If you start with the assumption that you somehow created everything that you've experienced and you ask yourself why you did it, you'll gain immeasurable insight into the workings of your own psyche.
If that doesn't appeal to you, utilize the principle behind it and concoct a different method. The principle is this: view everything as an opportunity. Saying how screwed up the world is is a dead end. Where can you go with that? What can you do with it? Your list of actions is limited to reactions. You are at the mercy of the whims of fate. If, instead, you say to yourself, "I can make my life anything I want it to be" and you ask, "how do I need to change to get what I want?" you'll slowly break the cycle you're trapped in.
And note that there's a world of difference between asking, "how should I change" and "what should I change." In all the threads you've posted, you've focused on externals. You wanted to define yourself by your religion, then you wanted to define yourself by whether or not you did volunteer work, you've been trying to define yourself as a darkworker, and now you seem to think that defining yourself as a stripper will lead you to happiness. None of those things define you. None of those things are you or can ever be you. If you really want to change, you're going to have to do something drastically different than you've ever done before. If what you've done before now (rather, if the mindset driving you) were adequate, you wouldn't be here asking for our input on yet another slip-shod solution. Tear apart your paradigm and start fresh. It's high time you questioned your fundamental assumptions about how life works.
I was going to link you to a different article, but I can't tell which one it is just by scoping the archives of Asmoday's site so this will have to do for now. It's about breaking patterns of thought and acting unconventionally. Perhaps it will help you break past convention:
The Coyote Option
If you want to search for the article I was thinking of, it was about identity and how to boil it down to your essence. It'd be helpful to search for material on that as I think the vast majority of your issues are rooted in identity. Since you appear to be somewhat spiritually inclined, Alchemy would be an excellent discipline for you to explore. This book would be a great place to start:
Amazon.com: On Becoming an Alchemist: A Guide for the Modern Magician (9781590306871): Catherine MacCoun: Books