Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post

Dani · 02-15-2007, 07:34 AM

Kali,

The problem with this, and with your other post especially is that you don't leave much room for anything but sympathy, and sympathy just makes all your troubles seem more real and valid and harder to escape from.

Most of the people here understand that to pat you on the back and tell you how hard done by you are will just make it worse and disempower you even more.

I will run the risk of offending you and attempt to help.

re Clinical depression :- I was diagnosed CD when i was in my early teens. Fought to be in control of my mind and emotions for four years without medication, won, and am now pretty much free of it. It can be done. *patiently waits for the 'But mine is different', 'you just don't understand how hard it is' etc. *

I would take a quick look over your posts, all you are focussing on is how bad things are. -I- started to feel down reading them. If this is what you are thinking all day no wonder you are depressed.

I can find at least 6 negative affirmations in your other post and dozens in this one. If you weren't depressed before you wrote them I can assure you, you would have been after them.

Before you berate me, please write a post about how good everything is in your life, then see how you feel. e.g. You don't live in Bhagdad where you have about a 60%+ of dying everytime you leave your house. Or Africa, where your problem would be finding three things to eat, not 3 computer programs to learn. At least 2/3 of the world's population would give everything they have to swap lives with you without thinking twice.

$50 bet if you write that post you will feel better (until you start thinking about the bad again) I promise in front of everyone here that I will pay your paypal account $50 US if you put in the effort to write a positive post and recieve no benefit whatsoever from it. At least you can afford to get your hair and/or nails done then.

If you refuse to write the positive post, i.e. refuse to make any attempt to feel better, then you are effectively saying that you want to be depressed.

I don't think you do, so give it a go.

Life is sometimes tough. Today it's yours, 6 months ago it was mine. If you dwell on it too much it will stay that way. If you turn around, it WILL come good. *insert pantene shampoo ad here* (who gets that one?)

re Sites :- If you want help making your site look good, look for a partner who is a geek and would prefer to build than write, and do a profit share. e.g. I put up a post yesterday that I can make pretty sites but I need people to give me the content. Why didn't you reply to that? If your site doesn't make money then at least you didn't lose any, because you only have to pay me when you make some.

If you sort yourself out I would be happy to work with you. I have a decent amount of respect for you from what I have seen you say in these forums so far. I will forgive these two posts. I almost had a spat attack recently myself.

Yes you are in a pit, I understand, and give a bit of sympathy for that. Wallowing in it will keep you there, for that you get no sympathy. It isn't easy I know, but if you don't stop talking about how bad it is you will only make it harder.

A. Write the positive post, earn your $50, then abuse me for how your depression and situation is special and I just don't understand how hard it is.

Or B. write it, feel better, find someone to help you with your sites, (me or another doesn't matter) and make a lot more than $50, then get out of the dingy neighborhood, taking your grandfather with you. You might even have enough change to put your sister into counselling, and get a lawyer for the house.

02-15-2007, 07:34 AM	#3 (permalink)
Dani Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 305	Kali, The problem with this, and with your other post especially is that you don't leave much room for anything but sympathy, and sympathy just makes all your troubles seem more real and valid and harder to escape from. Most of the people here understand that to pat you on the back and tell you how hard done by you are will just make it worse and disempower you even more. I will run the risk of offending you and attempt to help. re Clinical depression :- I was diagnosed CD when i was in my early teens. Fought to be in control of my mind and emotions for four years without medication, won, and am now pretty much free of it. It can be done. patiently waits for the 'But mine is different', 'you just don't understand how hard it is' etc. I would take a quick look over your posts, all you are focussing on is how bad things are. -I- started to feel down reading them. If this is what you are thinking all day no wonder you are depressed. I can find at least 6 negative affirmations in your other post and dozens in this one. If you weren't depressed before you wrote them I can assure you, you would have been after them. Before you berate me, please write a post about how good everything is in your life, then see how you feel. e.g. You don't live in Bhagdad where you have about a 60%+ of dying everytime you leave your house. Or Africa, where your problem would be finding three things to eat, not 3 computer programs to learn. At least 2/3 of the world's population would give everything they have to swap lives with you without thinking twice. $50 bet if you write that post you will feel better (until you start thinking about the bad again) I promise in front of everyone here that I will pay your paypal account $50 US if you put in the effort to write a positive post and recieve no benefit whatsoever from it. At least you can afford to get your hair and/or nails done then. If you refuse to write the positive post, i.e. refuse to make any attempt to feel better, then you are effectively saying that you want to be depressed. I don't think you do, so give it a go. Life is sometimes tough. Today it's yours, 6 months ago it was mine. If you dwell on it too much it will stay that way. If you turn around, it WILL come good. insert pantene shampoo ad here (who gets that one?) re Sites :- If you want help making your site look good, look for a partner who is a geek and would prefer to build than write, and do a profit share. e.g. I put up a post yesterday that I can make pretty sites but I need people to give me the content. Why didn't you reply to that? If your site doesn't make money then at least you didn't lose any, because you only have to pay me when you make some. If you sort yourself out I would be happy to work with you. I have a decent amount of respect for you from what I have seen you say in these forums so far. I will forgive these two posts. I almost had a spat attack recently myself. Yes you are in a pit, I understand, and give a bit of sympathy for that. Wallowing in it will keep you there, for that you get no sympathy. It isn't easy I know, but if you don't stop talking about how bad it is you will only make it harder. A. Write the positive post, earn your $50, then abuse me for how your depression and situation is special and I just don't understand how hard it is. Or B. write it, feel better, find someone to help you with your sites, (me or another doesn't matter) and make a lot more than $50, then get out of the dingy neighborhood, taking your grandfather with you. You might even have enough change to put your sister into counselling, and get a lawyer for the house. Last edited by Dani; 02-15-2007 at 08:10 AM.