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Old 09-08-2009, 06:13 AM   #37 (permalink)
Cochonette
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 3,216
Cochonette is absolutely unstoppableCochonette is absolutely unstoppableCochonette is absolutely unstoppableCochonette is absolutely unstoppableCochonette is absolutely unstoppableCochonette is absolutely unstoppableCochonette is absolutely unstoppableCochonette is absolutely unstoppableCochonette is absolutely unstoppableCochonette is absolutely unstoppableCochonette is absolutely unstoppable
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I used to be extremely shy. In some situations, I may still be. In class, I get ridiculously nervous just to say one sentence, and I usually end up not saying it. My heart will pound really hard to the point I think the people around me can hear it, only for me to say nothing because someone else said it or I just was too scared. There are also enough settings I feel comfortable in talking to people now that I am not terribly concerned about mingling with those I don't immediately connect with. I did have a blast on Sunday tabling for Aikido... one of the other people tabling is very outgoing and knows marketing skills, so I saw him as a role-model, followed his lead, and felt great and much less socially inhibited than usual. I felt pretty comfortable loudly saying "hey" to everyone who walked by who I thought might be interested... That was so invigorating that when I walked back to my dorm, I greeted the guard without thinking twice (I always think twice about it unless I'm already familiar with that guard), and then I went to buy some food and felt totally connected with the cashier for those few seconds.... I know that sounds completely trivial, but it was pretty awesome to me.

Anyway... the social courage I really need to work on is on a more intimate level. How do I deal with people who I constantly disagree with? How do I deal with this person I have felt more intimate with than anyone who I subsequently became afraid of because she stopped communicating with me? I find that talking to a lot of people online and overcoming my fears of people I used to avoid even encountering is helpful... I wonder what else I could do.
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