Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post - Have You Given Up Alcohol? If So, What Have Been The Benefits?

carenkh · 08-29-2009, 11:51 AM

I drank pretty heavily until my mid-twenties, then I got into recovery, a 12-step group, and didn't use alcohol or other drugs (except caffeine & sugar!) for over 15 years. I experienced a GREAT amount of growth in those years.

A couple years ago, I stopped going to 12-step meetings; I was not being fed any more, and while you're encouraged to keep going to meetings to be there for the newcomers, I gave it over a year of consideration and decided to not go. I'm not a loud, showy person, so I didn't have people asking me to sponsor them, or if they did, they'd ask, but then never call or follow up.

Because it had been so long since I had drank, I was wondering what the effects would be - I wanted to make sure I was making the choice to not drink from a fully aware place, not out of the fear-based abstinence 12-step groups engender. So, I tried alcohol a couple weekends. Drinks that I had missed during all those years.

What I found was that the effects are much more far-reaching than just the small time I had a buzz, or the next morning. For weeks after even just a couple drinks, I was not thinking as clearly, I didn't feel as present, and I felt a little... depressed.

I tried on a couple different occasions, over a year or so, and always had the same experience. Only once in that time did I drink what I would consider to be heavily, where I was stumbling slightly and likely to blurt out anything. The effects were the same no matter the amount I drank.

I've stayed away since, don't feel compelled to drink, and while sometimes I have a slight desire to, it's just not worth it.

I'm looking at the place recovery has in a life where I'm taking complete responsibility; where I'm living at total choice. I don't think it has a place at all! But I have no doubt I needed that support when I first stopped, I believe connecting with that group saved my life.

It's something I'd love to discuss, but the only person I've met who had the same experience passed away last year. Most 12-steppers are convinced I'm going to go wild and drink until I die, and people who haven't been in recovery don't understand being in that place. There's a message in 12-step groups that you never "graduate", you're never cured, you'll be an alcoholic or addict forever, but I'm finding otherwise, in my life of freedom.

08-29-2009, 11:51 AM	#15 (permalink)
carenkh Family Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Charlotte, NC Posts: 1,800	I drank pretty heavily until my mid-twenties, then I got into recovery, a 12-step group, and didn't use alcohol or other drugs (except caffeine & sugar!) for over 15 years. I experienced a GREAT amount of growth in those years. A couple years ago, I stopped going to 12-step meetings; I was not being fed any more, and while you're encouraged to keep going to meetings to be there for the newcomers, I gave it over a year of consideration and decided to not go. I'm not a loud, showy person, so I didn't have people asking me to sponsor them, or if they did, they'd ask, but then never call or follow up. Because it had been so long since I had drank, I was wondering what the effects would be - I wanted to make sure I was making the choice to not drink from a fully aware place, not out of the fear-based abstinence 12-step groups engender. So, I tried alcohol a couple weekends. Drinks that I had missed during all those years. What I found was that the effects are much more far-reaching than just the small time I had a buzz, or the next morning. For weeks after even just a couple drinks, I was not thinking as clearly, I didn't feel as present, and I felt a little... depressed. I tried on a couple different occasions, over a year or so, and always had the same experience. Only once in that time did I drink what I would consider to be heavily, where I was stumbling slightly and likely to blurt out anything. The effects were the same no matter the amount I drank. I've stayed away since, don't feel compelled to drink, and while sometimes I have a slight desire to, it's just not worth it. I'm looking at the place recovery has in a life where I'm taking complete responsibility; where I'm living at total choice. I don't think it has a place at all! But I have no doubt I needed that support when I first stopped, I believe connecting with that group saved my life. It's something I'd love to discuss, but the only person I've met who had the same experience passed away last year. Most 12-steppers are convinced I'm going to go wild and drink until I die, and people who haven't been in recovery don't understand being in that place. There's a message in 12-step groups that you never "graduate", you're never cured, you'll be an alcoholic or addict forever, but I'm finding otherwise, in my life of freedom.