Erin's article already answers your original question. You say you're confused, and the journaling didn't work for you, but for us to really help you, you need to give a bit more info on what you did exactly, and what you expect to happen.
It is kind of frustrating to sit on the other side of the internet reading very short questions and thinking about you as somebody who wants us to wave a magic wand and make it all happen for you somehow.
My short (and in my opinion perfectly valid and correct) answer to your original question is: look inside yourself.
Does that help you much?