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Originally Posted by runningbird  Yeah, I went to college - but hardly got any of the rewarding experiences that it entails. I made some mistakes - acquired bad habits and lived an unhealthily introverted lifestyle - for the first year or two. Then I took on a demanding major that I hated (mechanical engineering) because my dad, who was paying for it, wanted me to pick something practical. My introversion coupled with my demanding schedule made college more like a job from hell than a rich, fulfilling opportunity. I rarely went to parties or events, dated, or otherwise had a life.
It should have been a time to explore and develop socially and culturally, but I made minuscule steps down those avenues. Now I feel like this great experience that most people go through is forever lost for me.
I realize a lot of people never get to go at all, but I still feel angry about my experience. Can anyone relate?  |
I would imagine that the "college experience" is exactly why I hate college these days. I don't want college for friends and networking, I want college for job-style acquisition of extremely useful knowledge. That is awesome.
Now, I couldn't have that if I hated what I was doing, and instead when my parents initially pushed me to go I refused because I had no objective. They, however, did not see that as a problem, and instead saw paying thousands of dollars+thousands more taxpayer dollars as a means to an end for social acceptance.
I hated that mindset, and I hated being in classes with people that were treating college that way, because they'd often bring their own personal lives into the classroom, and derail the topic, just like back in gradeschool.
OTOH, I'm about as introverted as you can get, and I used to say similar things to myself, but this is before I even understood what I wanted from an academic institution, or people in general.
I also don't much care for the party scene anyway. I've lost a handful of friends to excessive college endeavoring, and the effects that lifestyle may or may not have on one's internal organs.
It really sucks getting a call at 3AM from a group of drunk people that are apparently observing the corpse of a former friend which is sprawled out in the bathtub with water running in an attempt to "wake the dead as hell", and all because alcohol and xanax are so fun to mix together, and parties, and social lives, and everything BUT what is important.
You didn't miss out on anything, and getting a date is as simple as realizing a woman and a man are essentially the same thing, minor differences here and there, but each have a complex structure of mind which is, in most cases, extremely versatile and elaborate.
Or, in other words, a lot of the time the same stuff that makes you happy - whatever it is - is the same thing that makes anyone else happy, male or female. Not exclusively, of course, because there are different types of people. Make someone happy, and establish yourself as someone who isn't absolutely flakey in every regard, and has an amount of substance about him, and you should be good to go no matter how many things you think are wrong about yourself - if applicable.
Besides, dating in college leads to failed exams and dropped courses anyway, so presumably you'd be a little better off.
All things are possible if you believe they are, and a smile, strange as it may be.. will really nuke your perception of people as it currently stands. Just walk around smiling, and your life will be different immediately.
BTW, why do you hate mechanical engineering?