Quote:
Originally Posted by sallyfrieldam  hi jamasiel
is there porn that doesnt involve violence? if so can you give me the keywords so i can google it and find it. I have looked and looked and all i can find is violence wrapped up as sex. Farryn seems to be expressing a wish for a monogamous rellationship. Do you think her boyfriend is being monogamous by regularly masturbating to the thought of being sexual with other women and saying they should be sexual with other people? |
I can't answer that question because you're obviously viewing porn in entirely different terms than I do. I don't view most porn as violent. (Although some is, of course)
I'm not going to argue the point with you, but seeing as we're on such divergent points on that, I really don't see how we can connect on it.
You're comparing fantasy life to action (even thinking about other people is akin to action) - which just shows how far apart we are on this, and I consider it pointless to try to persuade you otherwise, or even say you're "wrong" vs. me being "right".
If he's saying they should be sexual with other people,that's radically different than masturbating to fantasy. I'm not sure what that has to do with a fulfilling relationship.
Your minds are free - we're advanced beyond animals because of our capacity to fantasy, and fantasy is actually a tool for engagement with your own partner ~and~ reinforces the ability to not seek outside sexual satisfaction.
Quote:
The solutions you offer...
"either with him using it less or not at all, you accepting its role in his life, or seeing that it all just doesn't matter that much."
... seem to overlook farryn feelings about porn being a bad thing. Do you think porn is an acceptable part of a loving monogamous relationship?
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I think it
can be. You seem to think it strictly
can't be.
I don't think our roads will ever meet.
You'll kindly note that I said that an option would be to him changing his using porn - or changing her mindset. (I'll try to assume you weren't deliberately ignoring that part.)
Which do you think is more likely?
Additionally, her changing her mindset and approach would be more likely to leading to less or non-using of porn, if that is the conclusion they reach
together. I'm disinterested in whether I prove to you that porn is a-ok, but would rather encourage people to have fulfilling relationships. I have a great one, porn and all. You can call me a liar, if you wish, but I'm a walking, breathing example of it working out fine. Thanks!