Hi Brendan. I remember you said I (or we) are sometimes too hard on ourselves about this...
I've just taken a test of a science magazine about the mistakes people use to do in flirting, in order to fix what I did wrong...
But the surprising result is that I don't make any of the mistakes.
Also they say that the people that's more successfull in flirting are the ones who hold eye contact, smile and are bold.
And that's me, for instance, except not smiling sometimes lately...
We learn the "you're responsible for everything in your life" thing... but what if is not us who are unlearnt but mostly others...
You can make things better in your life if they depend 100 % on you. If I can not play the guitar, I can learn... that's 100% me.
But for flirting you depend on other people... so you're not responsible of them, so you can't fix that problem like others, by learning, or doing things you never did...
And that's why it hurts, you're used to problem-solving and then you face a problem that remains unsolved for you, and so you feel like you're silly or don't understand the problem, but it doesn't depend on you really.
Though still some will say it only depends on you, and it can be fixed in 7 days, using some method, etc.
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