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Originally Posted by James81  Looks are pretty important to me. I don't have ridiculously high standards for beauty, but I do have standards and before I'll date someone, they need to be met. And I'm thinking that they could also become a dealbreaker if her looks were good when we met, but then she let herself go. The way I see it, I strive to keep myself in decent shape, I want to be with someone who does the same. Letting yourself go is a possible sign of other qualities that pop up that turn me off (so it's not necessarily the looks themselves, but the qualities that usually come with letting yourself go).
I'm sure that sounds pretty vain from society's general outlook of "what's inside is what counts," but if I'm not physically attracted to someone, I'm going to be less likely to want to have sex with them. Me not wanting to have sex with them, will probably mean that I WON'T have sex, and not having sex tends to do some pretty serious damage to a relationship (it did with my marriage anyway).
So yeah, they are important. But they aren't the only thing that matters. A girl can be gorgeous, but have a crappy attitude and I would be turned off in an instant. Prime example celebrity-wise would be Paris Hilton. I know she's considered beautiful by many, but I can't stand her and hence I'm not attracted to her. |
I wouldn't feel too bad about sounding vain. I don't and I feel exactly the same way you do, except for the bit about paris hilton (she's a business woman who has cultivated an image that makes her a lot of money, i respect that, even if she isn't conforming to what society says women should do)