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starchamber · 07-28-2009, 10:40 AM

Hi,

I'd like to get some feedback about a challenge I'm facing in my relationship at present.

My boyfriend and I had a serious honest talk about our sexuality. I have always encouraged honesty in our relationship yet have learn't something I'm struggling to deal with.

My boyfriend revealed that he loves Women and looking at their bodies and how he thinks about sex with different Women he meets. He also said he thinks of other Women during sex with me.

He said he looks all the time at other Women yet hides it from me through fear of me thinking he's the unfaithful type. He has thought about what it would be like to have sex with my friends and has said he has even got an erection with some of the Women he looks at.

I, on the other hand have never thought of sex with another not even during sex with him. I admire Men I find attractive and admire whatever physical attribute that grabbed me whether it be the way he dresses, smiles etc... but I have never thought of sex with another.

This has bought up some concerns for me that he may be the type to be unfaithful and wonder whether he would rather be with them than me. I don't feel special to him anymore and feel second best.

In my past relationships I knew that my boyfriends looked and just thought they were admiring like I did yet I didn't think they were wondering what it would be like to have sex with them and never thought or felt they were thinking about sex with others while we had sex.

This information has shocked me and I don't feel our sex is exclusive anymore in a mental sense, and when we have sex now, I'm wondering if he's thinking of another. It's really making me withdrawer.

I haven't spoken to him about how I feel as I'm trying to get my head around this.

I asked for honesty and I sure got it yet I'm feeling uncomfortable with the truth. I don't want to be annoyed with him as that may stop him from being honest in the future.

Unfortunately I'm just not feeling special to him now as I have in the past and am wondering if he needs to go and have sex with these other Women to get it out of his system. I also wonder whether he wishes he was with these other Women yet believes they would not be interested in him and I'll do because I'm available.

He has said he would never act on these thoughts, that he loves me dearly and wants to be with me for the rest of my life, yet I'm now having doubts that he's the one.

Has anyone else dealt with this and overcome it.

07-28-2009, 10:40 AM	#1 (permalink)
starchamber Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Toronto, Canada Posts: 4	Intimidated with the truth Hi, I'd like to get some feedback about a challenge I'm facing in my relationship at present. My boyfriend and I had a serious honest talk about our sexuality. I have always encouraged honesty in our relationship yet have learn't something I'm struggling to deal with. My boyfriend revealed that he loves Women and looking at their bodies and how he thinks about sex with different Women he meets. He also said he thinks of other Women during sex with me. He said he looks all the time at other Women yet hides it from me through fear of me thinking he's the unfaithful type. He has thought about what it would be like to have sex with my friends and has said he has even got an erection with some of the Women he looks at. I, on the other hand have never thought of sex with another not even during sex with him. I admire Men I find attractive and admire whatever physical attribute that grabbed me whether it be the way he dresses, smiles etc... but I have never thought of sex with another. This has bought up some concerns for me that he may be the type to be unfaithful and wonder whether he would rather be with them than me. I don't feel special to him anymore and feel second best. In my past relationships I knew that my boyfriends looked and just thought they were admiring like I did yet I didn't think they were wondering what it would be like to have sex with them and never thought or felt they were thinking about sex with others while we had sex. This information has shocked me and I don't feel our sex is exclusive anymore in a mental sense, and when we have sex now, I'm wondering if he's thinking of another. It's really making me withdrawer. I haven't spoken to him about how I feel as I'm trying to get my head around this. I asked for honesty and I sure got it yet I'm feeling uncomfortable with the truth. I don't want to be annoyed with him as that may stop him from being honest in the future. Unfortunately I'm just not feeling special to him now as I have in the past and am wondering if he needs to go and have sex with these other Women to get it out of his system. I also wonder whether he wishes he was with these other Women yet believes they would not be interested in him and I'll do because I'm available. He has said he would never act on these thoughts, that he loves me dearly and wants to be with me for the rest of my life, yet I'm now having doubts that he's the one. Has anyone else dealt with this and overcome it.