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Old 02-05-2007, 12:02 PM   #7 (permalink)
JHL
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To me, it sounds like they are passing responsibility that should be theirs, onto you.

There are a number of reasons why they may have requested a mediator, for example:

- They dont trust themselves enough to handle the conversation well.
- They dont trust the other person to handle the conversation well.
- They are fearful of having the conversation and would feel more secure with you there to manage potential conflict.
- They dont trust the other person and privately want a witness to be present who can later confirm just how unreasonable the other person is, and that they were right all along.

In all cases I feel it would be better for them - and you - that they take responsibility and conduct this conversation by themselves. It probably is an unpleasant prospect, but they will both grow from confronting it.

There is also the possibility that if you are there, then you are the one they will each naturally want to prove their case to, with the result that you may end up with more of a 'performance' from each other them, rather than a genuine and sincere engagement.

I would suggest telling them that you have every confidence in their ability to handle things maturely and sensitively, and that you feel it would be best if you were not present.
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