Originally Posted by happyeq
Some part of me desperately wants to change, but the habit is stronger than my healthy voice.
Your healthy voice is already strong enough for you to admit that you have a problem, and to share your thoughts and feelings about it with others. If you allow it to grow, that healthy voice will get even stronger.
It would be a good idea to seek professional help for your problem, since bulimia is a serious condition. You've achieved success in other areas of your life, which is great, but if this problem is still holding you down there's no shame in asking for help from a doctor or counselor who has an expertise in this area, and knows how to help you in a meaningful way.
Go ahead and take whatever steps you think are necessary for you to get over this, to help you reach your true potential.