It's a painful question, and I wish there were an easy answer I could give. When you stop analyzing and agonizing, what does your heart tell you? Seriously. Your intuition will get you closer to knowing than anything external to you. I'm not going to say that reconciling mind and intuition is an easy thing, but for questions of truth, there is no answer that can satisfy the mind. There is, however, knowing that will satisfy the spirit. And that will bring the peace that I think is what you're really looking for. I mean, if truth is, as you speculate, the fundamental and inviolable nature of spirit/god/universe/etc., we're in no position to comment on it; we're inside the fishbowl, so how can we explain what's going on in the room? All we have to go on is the intuition that says it's okay, just like your own suffering is okay. We can come up with lots of answers to the question, but only that assurance from spirit answers questioning.
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