I would suggest the key word here is "detachment" ... I completely agree with rawxstasy ... at the moment you are "attached" to a "disease". You are also "attached" to the ex (which you have admitted to realising that you cannot have a "need" for her to come back etc).
Detach/let go. There is no "need" to label/conceptualise the disease, its modus operandi, its payload etc. There is really no need to know its name, in fact I am going to throw it out there, no disease truly exists in its "absolute" form, only in the "reality" of the individual.
Go inside of yourself to your feelings, your intuition, your gut sense and start to work out the "real" situation. Again I am with rawxstasy on this, there is something to do with the intimacy part. Your pain body has identified with that some how and it could go back further to your past (it may not just be intimacy as such, but to do with closeness, love, along those lines).
Again I will throw it out there that how do you know that you want to be with your ex again? At this stage you are not coming from a place of internal "fullness" so you have a perceived "lack" and that means you are manifesting more of that.
Work on yourself, its ok to stand still in life, and enjoy life as it is, then spend time on yourself to "fill yourself up", then ask yourself, do you desire her back in your life. Whatever you "instinctual" answer is IS the answer for you and then go with that.
You can be, do, or have anything you desire, and this can only come from the "belief" that you KNOW it will be, not that you "hope". Also be aware of living in the past and projecting to the future .... you will forget to live in the now. Nothing is stopping you from what you desire, only your right brained/logical side of you.
Believe, trust and "love" yourself first, if you cannot do that for YOU, you cannot really expect anyone else to ...
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