First of all shut up with all this negativity.
Grow a pair and face up to what you've done. You've made a balls up, no doubt but every wrong can be righted given time and effort.
The question is, are you ready to change?
If you are then suck it up and admit to yourself you need to start again. 19 years old is not too late to change. It's time to get tough, get hardline with yourself. Have you considered taking a year out, maybe working, getting some self discipline before college?
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