Kanzeon:
You might have been a Catholic, or gone to a sangha, or meditated on this or meditated on that. None of that particularly interests or impresses me.
I have a more intuitive sort of approach towards people. And basically there is nothing about your vibes that gives me much sense that you represent any state of spiritual evolution that I might aspire to.
Seriously, read through your own posts in this thread. Then ask yourself; what kind of attributes do they have? Are they better represented by, say:
love ... or hate?
patience ... or aggression?
clarity ... or confusion?
acceptance ... or judgment?
Go reflect, dear Kanzeon. No need to answer here, if you are not comfortable doing so.