Originally Posted by happymomof2
Have any of you read Byron Katie's book Loving What Is
? Steve's message sounds very similar to Katie's, specifically the process she calls "The Turnaround."
If you're interested, check out her website http://www.thework.com/
. I find myself automatically employing her 4-step process (followed most importantly by the "turnaround'), whenever I am bothered by relationship issues.
I definitely see the parallels with Byron Katie - she advises parents to start picking up the socks if you want your kids to pick up the socks. Sort of hard for me to stick to completely.
Okay - so my daughter is goofing off on the computer and IMing her friends instead of doing homework or chores, and her grades are not what they should be - I am goofing off on the computer when I should be working? Yes. She is disrespectful - I am disrespectful to her - yes. She pointed out to me when I commented on her report card, that I am not the most exemplary mother (yes, exemplary) - perfect choice of words.
Then my relationship with my mother - last night she called me and was so difficult that after 30 minutes, I told her that I'd had enough and hung up on her, then spent several hours lying awake in bed reminding myself that she is irrational and delusional and I can't do anything about it So I should be more sane? Have to think about this.