Interesting piece, as always. While not everything in the articles resonates with me, I do find that whenever I'm not getting what I want from a relationship, there is something in me that needs to change to make it work.
Most recently, I was desperately trying to grow a deeper friendship with one of my band members, but none of my efforts were helping. The harder I tried, the further I felt removed from my goal. Only when I finally gave up in frustration and just let things be, did the friendship I desired bloom. I had long since earned his unconditional friendship, but just couldn't see it... doh!