[newsbone]

Originally Posted by ssandra

I disagree here completely. There are things that you could handle physically, but not mentally. Example; being bullied (either adults at work, or children at school), being called names. Physically nothing happens, you can handle it. Mentally it is another issue all together.

Same with sex. Your body can be ready, but that doesn´t mean that your mind is as well. In adolecense you grow both physically and mentally, but it doesn´t happen at the same time and in the same pace..

Why should someone put up with bullying when there is no physical threat to back it up? I don’t get it ssandra! It is the fear of either the physical reprisal or being sacked that makes people not to stand up and face the bullies in the first place, have ever witnessed a situation where the physically inferior individual mistreats the physically superior in school or a junior at work bullying a superior? Impossible! And on sex you can only be not ready out of inexperience this can only be solved by participating in the act, which I believe the older the second partner is the easier and more fulfilling the first experience can be.

Originally Posted by ssandra

Ofcourse a 14 yr old can differentiate between pain and pleasure. But it is not always that simple. Sex (especially the first few times) can be very very intense and can have lasting consequenses, not just babies but also how they feel about themselves, how they feel about their sexuality and their selfimage. At 14 you don´t have the capability yet to see these things, at 14 it is still very much about instant gratification.

The intensity of the first few times calls for an experienced hand not the excited first timer or another teenager who has very little experience with a point to prove. Sex has and will always be about instant gratification with love and trust being used as a facade to this truth, as it does not matter how you approach it, at the end of the day if one party continuously doesn’t get satisfied love will disappear into thin air or choose to cheat while those who decide to persevere in a non-satisfactory relationship end up emotional wrecks.

Originally Posted by ssandra

There can never be an equal give and take between a 14 and 40 year old because of the difference in experience, even if the 40 year old would still be a virgin as well. As a child you have an image in your mind of adults, they have a power over you.
Power can be very very subtle, it doesn´t have to be rape. As a child adults are in a position of power, they have power over you, simply by being adults. Even if the 40 yr old doesn´t realise this, it still is there..

The power that we have over the young is the same reason we tend to limit them within what we want them to be, the position that this thread seems to threaten the one that we are not ready to give up. This is an illusion that we seem to have created then turn around blame the kids of being immature is the very one am propagating against.

Originally Posted by ssandra

About the learning, it is not a teaching thing. It is about experimenting. As an example; a 3 yr old playing with dolls with another 3 yr old is not the same as a 3 yr old getting a lesson from a 40 yr old in how to play with dolls. She has to experience it on her own, discover alone what she likes about dolls, how she wants to play. But if an adult tells her how to play she will not be able to do this..

You seem to forget that we introduced the dolls to the kids in the first place they did not choose it over something else, we condition them to think in a specific way then turn around and use what we have put in them against them. We teach our kids on how to play with the dolls they don’t learn on their own; we tell them what it is and how they are supposed even carry them. It is dolls because we said it is, we made it a girl-like doll even gave it a figure that we think will assist us keep the girl-kids quite( can you give a doll to a boy?); it is us the adults who are responsible ssandra.

Originally Posted by ssandra

I feel sorry for you that you only had such a limited experience with women. If you are willing to take something from me, there are other forms of relationships, build on equality and trust. Not on trying to get something from someone by giving or withholding sex.
Again, I’m sorry that you see the world like this. There is a whole different world out there, where it doesn’t revolve around power and making people kill for you.

Ha! Ha! Ha! For your information am pretty much experienced with women and it is therefore out of the same that I authoritatively speak. Why do you think there is commercialization of sex ssandra? There are a lot of dating sites out there if you care to go through them the subject remains one; SEX! I trust my mother and sisters and I have a beautiful relationship with them, why then should I go out and find a stranger bring her to my house, marry her and live with her just for the sake of equality and trust- excuse me; it is all about sex nothing more nothing less in as much as we shall try to pretend. A lot of relationships that pride themselves on equality and trust end up with separation or divorce sooner than later but a sexually active couple who understand the power of sex and make good use of the available resources to maintain an active sex life in their relationship remain together longer, research on that.
Women either consciously or otherwise use sex to attain greater heights in almost everything they choose to, marriages, jobs, pay rise, etc (Pandora’s Box am opening here)

Originally Posted by ssandra

I am not against sex, or even against sex between young people, as long as it is their choice and they are not forced, bullied or influenced by anyone. And teenagers get influenced very easy, especially by adults.

So what is the point? How can one have consensual sex without influencing another via seduction?