Well, it's been a long time since he ended our relationship (8 months) and he's been seeing someone else for 5 months.
I have been doing a lot of focussing on me, but still come back to thoughts of him.
He wants to catch up and talk sometime. I don't know why. He is with someone else.
Although I do want us to be together, I can't pretend that I can just be friends. We were together for 10 years.
I can't let go of the negative feelings that I am no longer good enough for him. There is still a lot of hurt I am processing. I know if we see each other the outcome won't be what I want (reconciliation), so I know I'm still not ready to see him if I am so focussed on the outcome or worried I will become upset.
While I am not obsessively thinking about him, I do still think about him a lot. Even last night I had a dream about him, that we were getting back together. But there was obvious disappointment when I woke up that it was just a dream. Perhaps it was because I watched the Notebook on tv last night and he looks quite a bit like the lead character!
Just not sure how to process this all on my own. How to get to that point of being ok no matter what. Whether I should see him or not, or keep no contact because he made his choice. That is the hardest part. I don't want to feel like I am controlling the situation by not seeing him. But he is with someone else.
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