I can far too well relate to the frustration of physical flaws that drag down your confidence and make you feel like you can't be who you really are.
Have you tried a binder for the gyne? If not, try underworks.com. I'm an FTM (female-to-male) transgender, so I use the same kinds of binders those with gynecomastia have. Having bitchtits sucks, doesn't it?
In response to all the "learn to love yourself" stuff--I find pursuing physical change no different than pursuing mental change. We can be whoever we want to be, right? Why is the physical body any different than our minds?
It's not. People work out to be more physically attractive and happier with themselves. They cut their hair to complement their features. They get body modifications to express themselves. They wear make-up to highlight their faces. They wear clothing that shows off their personality or body.
It's about self-expression on the outside. At least, that's what it is when we're acting on it from the healthiest place.
But don't let it mess up your relationships or self-esteem
right now. That's acting on it from an unhealthy place.
Not easy. I know. It's a constant battle not to let it get you down, but each time you pull yourself up from the frustration and depression it shortens the time you go down later.
You might try something... Sit down, and embrace your own power: know that you
can change your outside appearance to fit who you are inside. You have the
power to. Embrace that realization.
Then, feel the confidence and happiness you would feel if you
already changed it. And... just be that person.
Be that person you would be when you've made those changes. Be the confident, social, happy individual.
Be that person on the inside before you change yourself on the outside. Then, when you do make the changes, you will be acting on it from a healthy place.
You'll be happier and stronger for it, because then when you get the surgeries and get braces--you're changing your body to reflect YOU, not changing yourself to reflect your body (by gaining confidence via your body). Your body is a work of art that you can shape and mold to reflect who you are in whatever way you desire to--but you gotta be that person first.
However, if you're anything like me about physical flaws, it won't be easy to get there and you may never act on it from the perfectly healthy place. That's okay too. We're all human.
But... I think simply striving to be right
NOW who we would be THEN (post-surgery/etc) will make us stronger as people in the long run. Think about how freeing it would be if you could have that confidence now.
You can. You can also turn "I can," into "I will," and finally into "I am."
I hope that makes sense.