Quote:
Originally Posted by C33  "A Surrendered Single recognizes that if she wants to attract the man with whom she can develop intimacy, she cannot control relationships. She cannot determine who asks her out, how he'll do it, when he'll call or e-mail, or if he'll commit to her." |
Looks like surrender is getting a bum rap in this thread. Surrender doesn't always mean "giving up power"; at its finest it means "letting go." Don't you agree that the above quote is true: that a woman, in fact,
can't control relationships, determine who asks her out, how he'll do it, when he'll call, or if he'll commit to her? And if she does try to control him in these ways or others, she's not creating freedom or love for him or for herself? Of course the same is true for men, too!
That doesn't stop her from being a dynamic force in a loving relationship or from asking a man out.
I haven't read the book and don't know if the author is saying women should be subservient, which I would certainly not agree with. But to surrender the need or illusion to control another human being seems to me to be a really huge great step on the road to love. (pissed-off might be another helpful thing to let go of, in my opinion.)