Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post - Throwing away the most important thing in my life instead of dealing with my problems

Melly · 05-17-2009, 03:37 PM

I'm not a relationship expert but i hope my advice can help.

The ex girlfriend deserves the right to know that your sorry about the way you feel you treated her, that your changing to be a better person and that you do love her.

Replace weed and video games with something else.

You know my boyfriend has a 'release' which is his motorbike, when he goes out riding on it it clears his head and he forgets about his problems, its like he takes his anger out on his bike so when he comes back to me, he's ready for time with me not his problems and me.

Maybe find your release, like photography, drawing, long walks, car shows, swimming, boxing, just basic time out with friends, paintballing. Do whatever you think you'd enjoy or have enjoyed before, also try new things, you'd be surpised in what you start to like.

Video games are temporary entertainment, they are just there to keep us busy for awhile but its not a release or a hobby, its more of something to pass the time.

Its good that you've realised that you and your crush wasn't mean't to be and tbh it sounds like it was just chemisty between you two, everyone always has that someone we have more chemisty with than others, its like friends, you always have that friend you get along with abit more easier. Being in love doesn't poke our eyes out, its natural to think other people are attactive while being with another person, its whether you act on it that is the problem.

All couples agrue or disagree, agruements and disagreements are normal, nothings perfect and you can't always be happy, we're allowed to have our down moments and sometimes in relationship we do have those silly reacurring agruements only because we haven't disgusted how to solve the problem together, we've just told each other its a problem that needs solving. If you get what i mean.

I think your back on the right track, it sounds like you've changed alot already so i wish you all the best for the future.

05-17-2009, 03:37 PM	#8 (permalink)
Melly Junior Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: England Posts: 2	I'm not a relationship expert but i hope my advice can help. The ex girlfriend deserves the right to know that your sorry about the way you feel you treated her, that your changing to be a better person and that you do love her. Replace weed and video games with something else. You know my boyfriend has a 'release' which is his motorbike, when he goes out riding on it it clears his head and he forgets about his problems, its like he takes his anger out on his bike so when he comes back to me, he's ready for time with me not his problems and me. Maybe find your release, like photography, drawing, long walks, car shows, swimming, boxing, just basic time out with friends, paintballing. Do whatever you think you'd enjoy or have enjoyed before, also try new things, you'd be surpised in what you start to like. Video games are temporary entertainment, they are just there to keep us busy for awhile but its not a release or a hobby, its more of something to pass the time. Its good that you've realised that you and your crush wasn't mean't to be and tbh it sounds like it was just chemisty between you two, everyone always has that someone we have more chemisty with than others, its like friends, you always have that friend you get along with abit more easier. Being in love doesn't poke our eyes out, its natural to think other people are attactive while being with another person, its whether you act on it that is the problem. All couples agrue or disagree, agruements and disagreements are normal, nothings perfect and you can't always be happy, we're allowed to have our down moments and sometimes in relationship we do have those silly reacurring agruements only because we haven't disgusted how to solve the problem together, we've just told each other its a problem that needs solving. If you get what i mean. I think your back on the right track, it sounds like you've changed alot already so i wish you all the best for the future.