Brrrr, you really have a messed up sexual life.....
What do you really want from the relationship? Most of what you talked about i didn't understand very much! Seems you have been in the intricate relationship with someone who is even more messed up than you. If it had stayed in one-night-stand relationship with the older women you would never get into this type of mess in the first place. I had also few relationships with women fifteen to twenty five years older than me but it was a casual dinner and sex, with lots of cuddling (^_^) but i nor my partners never wanted to go further than that because it would messed up our life's. Older women were cool from when i was around sixteen till i was twenty four, well till i had relationship two years ago when i actually forbid my self to enter any longer term relationship with a woman of almost my mothers age. It was a cool and enlightening (^_^) experience but now i feel it was only a phase of wanting to gain a top notch experience (^_^).
Sick of wandering around, find a woman +/- 5 years in age difference from you. At least that is my H.O.!
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