hey rose A,
As you say the answer is inside of you ... listen to that wonderful "intuitive" voice within you. It has never lied or ever let you down. All your fear, anxiousness is coming from the false you, the conscious side of you looking for patterns, logic, answers, concepts.
When you are loving every moment of the day is when you are so truly aligned. This you know because you FEEL that, right?
Always be honest with yourself and don't kid yourself. You always get in life what you are intending, life is a mirror reflecting back to you what you vibrate out. You cannot say in your "head" that you "truly" want one thing, yet inside you are giving off the signals of something else.
When you have done all your internal work, then you are completely aligned and then The Process kicks in in ALL ways and you will be more "awake" to see and act on the synchs (if necessary).
Keep going and never be afraid to dream .... dreams DO come true
