Um. I've never been married, although I am in a longterm relationship. I guess everybody goes through dry spells, but marriage counseling? Unless you are fighting all the time and need someone to mediate, I dunno. And part of the problem was a lack of time, right>? Sure you could carve out some time to go, but from what I've read in psychology articals and whatnot, that might not be the best use of that time. Do something new and exciting together. You have to make time for life, not just work. And I read that if couples do something adventurous or novel together their brains are flooded with dopamine, and thus they feel happier, and they associate this happiness with the other person. And then you'll both feel better, thus more in the mood, with the energy to make a little love. And the act of making love will release more feel good chemicals, and with a little work you'll be out of you're rut. I know with my boyfriend, when things start to get a little stale, it helps me to stop expecting him to change his behavior BEFORE I do. (And sometimes he's the one who puts in the initial effort.) So, when I'm away from him, at work or whatever, I'll list all his good qualities, and try to get excited about him again, like I was in the courting phase. Then when we see eachother, I intentionally smile at him, maybe put my arms around him and let him know I think he's the best. Cause I really do appreciate him, but sometimes I don't feel like I do, and sometimes I don't show him like I should.
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