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anyway ,i detest the word 'sacrifice'
if thats the angle im going into a relationship with then i can only imagine the crap that lies ahead.
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That is true, but sacrifice is what it is, if you give everything up. And that is what I fear too, giving over and becoming resentful. I'm not putting
all needs ahead of your own, but am able to compromise to some extent.
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Basically you feel hurt because he's not giving it a shot but you have problem yourself with giving it a shot as well?
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Well, I've proposed a few alternatives, e.g. locating in a third, neutral country. I'm not completely unwilling to relocate either, not if I have a decent job because being a housewife would not be something I could take.
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(btw, a 30 year old man who has never lived more than a half an hour away from his parents is not in any way shape or form "odd." I'd say that probably describes like 80% of the people who are out there)
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Really? Maybe its just my country then, or certain parts of Europe in general. Here it would be more likely to be something like 90 per cent didnt live that close
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Relationships that START with a long distance phase are very hard to keep together. The reason is that you don't truly get to know one another until you are able to see each other on a regular basis (physically see each other....there is a huge difference between online interaction and real life interaction, and one of the KEY elements missing from your relationship is the consistent physical intimacy).
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True that, but the difference here is that we didnt really start with a long distance phase, but did have a rather intensive 3-4 months of dating beforehand. So the foundation was made face-to face, not online, thankfully. But, while I do not really recommend LDR's to anyone, they do offer an opportunity to grow, really communicate and figure out wheter yo do not just
love this person, but actually
like them as people, exactly due to the lack of physical intimacy.
Ps. since last post, we've had a discussion and he suggested that his demands might be unreasonable too, no iniative from my side. I'm no way an innocent and frail female, I can very well stand my ground if I need to. Maybe its a chance to grow, for both of us. So, we'll see how it turns out.
Thanks all for chipping in on this one.