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Old 05-04-2009, 03:28 PM   #9 (permalink)
elias_naur
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Quote:
Originally Posted by James81 View Post
But let me tell you, from my own experience, that the more I do it...the more I face those struggles and rise above them...the more I take up the responsibility....well, the more I love them and the more I grow as a person. I feel like my experience as a single dad has helped me grow in leaps and bounds, and through all my ups and downs and struggles, I've grown to love them deeper, appreciate them more, and grow a sense of inner strength that I could never have reached had I ran away like I originally wanted to do.
This I've heard variations of before, and in fact my ex-wife specifically states that "other single fathers [she knows] usually want to see more of their kids". This must be where I'm "broken" in some way. How long did it take you to come to this conclusion? Personally, I don't see any "point" in child caring for me as a parent, but while my ex-wife likes to do other things too, parenting is basically the _whole_ point for her.

The way I see it, this is not about just about responsibility, but about the underlying motivation for your specific actions. Just as you're vastly more efficient in work you do because you like it and it gives you meaning than work you don't see any greater meaning in.
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