If you love yourself first you don't "need" to have somebody else in your life. You are OK with being alone. I had to look at the reasons why I wanted someone in my life. I realized I was coming from "ego" I thought people would think more highly of me, I didn't have good self esteem. My life was boring, I wasn't good enough. I couldn't live without him etc. Once I accepted that I had these beliefs, I worked on why I felt this way. One was I afraid of feeling lonely. So I allowed myself to feel lonely, didn't try to run from it or distract myself. Eventually I didn't feel lonely anymore. I spent most of my time working on me and not thinking about him, although I still thought about him quite a bit.
I think sometimes we go through these seperations in order to learn these lessons otherwise we have to repeat them again.
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