Speaking of the popular list on del.icio.us, this site hit today:
Cre8pc on Usability & Holistic SEO An Absolute Goldmine of Web Design Education
Lots of links, including info on Flash, Dreamweaver, Typography, XML, and everything in between.
As for using Flash, it depends. Some companies swear by it. Some say you "gotta have it" because the clients say you "gotta have it." Others loathe it.
Personally, I loathe it. Except when it's used properly (which is almost never) ;-)
But as for
learning Flash, see if there's a community college or college/university in your area that's offering a class in Flash as a continuing education type course. That way you don't need to buy the program (or obtain it illegally) since you can use the computer labs on campus. Then if a prospective employer asks, you can say that you know how to use it. Same could be said for Photoshop, I guess, but The Gimp is a good free alternative.