Originally Posted by BlackWigger
Any advices on how to motivate myself to finally end my life ? I've been wishing for death for so long, and living life like that, and I'm still alive. It's quite frustrating.
This is a good case study for the Law of Attraction...in reverse! You state that you want to kill yourself, but if you really had formed the intention to do so, you would have already. It's much easier to die than it is to live - you just have to do nothing and eventually you'll die of thirst or starvation.
Life is complicated. And it doesn't matter, I agree with you. When you stop thinking of life as something important, and you just live the way you desire (live life according to YOUR values), then nothing really does matter. This frees you from having to worry about how you're living your life. That's liberating, but I think you see it as some kind of desperate position.