Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post - Converting Girl Friends into 'Girlfriends'

Flowz · 04-10-2009, 08:07 PM

Hey Johnny.. Great to see you here.. Sharing your insights and experiencew as always.. such an inspiration, shining light in what can at times (ands different angles) be a gloomy age.. Much respect..

It was over/around 3 years ago now that I first came across (pardon the pun) this post and your philosophy.. Off i was, implementing, experimenting all of what rang so true to my ears into my own life.. In the beginning it was shocking to see how many people, women especially were locked into/possessed by social conditioning. Witnessing how they would justify - what to me, and any other observant human - was utter nonsense caused me frustration at times, sadness at others.. Nowadays i find it a whole lot easier to empathize with them and offer my perspective subjectively without attachment..

There was one girl, a very good friend who I offered guilt free, nsa sex who has never taken me up on the offer.. Think she may have been upset because of one occassion where we were dry ♥♥♥*ing to the point of practically doing the deed.. After months of sexual tension beforehand.. then I pulled the pin, telling her i cant do her.. only because i was so turned on (form the tension) i knew i'd blow immediately & didnt want to put in a bad performance.. She never did treat me the same after this encounter.. Anyone care to point out why this may be I'd be interested to hear your take/s..

Also, Johnny I have offered this to another of my female friends, who has been my friend for a 3+ years now, who also hasn't taken it up, depsite obvious attraction, tension etc.. My belief is that EVENTUALLY said girls WILL come to their senses and see, hear or feel the beauty in it, and a time will come where we will laugh about how silly it was to not do something which feels so right.. (Just read your post on Patience - thought u may link me to it)

Side not; common sentiment I'll here from female friends (especially newly acquired ones) is "I know myself, if we start sleepign together I'll get attached n I don't want to put myself through that pain (knowing they cant 'have" me)" or something along those lines.. telling me they're either possessive or jealousy prone.. two traits i'm not after.. Was wondering if it's ethical for me to continue sexual relations with women in this position.. And/or how you would advise dealing with similar scenarios..

Overall, after trialling out the ideas presented in the OP myself, and it has been my experience that this offer - if honestly proposed with genuine intent on PRESERVING THE FRIENDSHIP FIRST AND FOREMOST - is very ecological for all parties involved.. especially when discussed between two mature, open minded friends..

Blah blah blah.. Rant over..

Respect

Flowz..

04-10-2009, 08:07 PM	#57 (permalink)
Flowz Junior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5	Hey Johnny.. Great to see you here.. Sharing your insights and experiencew as always.. such an inspiration, shining light in what can at times (ands different angles) be a gloomy age.. Much respect.. It was over/around 3 years ago now that I first came across (pardon the pun) this post and your philosophy.. Off i was, implementing, experimenting all of what rang so true to my ears into my own life.. In the beginning it was shocking to see how many people, women especially were locked into/possessed by social conditioning. Witnessing how they would justify - what to me, and any other observant human - was utter nonsense caused me frustration at times, sadness at others.. Nowadays i find it a whole lot easier to empathize with them and offer my perspective subjectively without attachment.. There was one girl, a very good friend who I offered guilt free, nsa sex who has never taken me up on the offer.. Think she may have been upset because of one occassion where we were dry ♥♥♥*ing to the point of practically doing the deed.. After months of sexual tension beforehand.. then I pulled the pin, telling her i cant do her.. only because i was so turned on (form the tension) i knew i'd blow immediately & didnt want to put in a bad performance.. She never did treat me the same after this encounter.. Anyone care to point out why this may be I'd be interested to hear your take/s.. Also, Johnny I have offered this to another of my female friends, who has been my friend for a 3+ years now, who also hasn't taken it up, depsite obvious attraction, tension etc.. My belief is that EVENTUALLY said girls WILL come to their senses and see, hear or feel the beauty in it, and a time will come where we will laugh about how silly it was to not do something which feels so right.. (Just read your post on Patience - thought u may link me to it) Side not; common sentiment I'll here from female friends (especially newly acquired ones) is "I know myself, if we start sleepign together I'll get attached n I don't want to put myself through that pain (knowing they cant 'have" me)" or something along those lines.. telling me they're either possessive or jealousy prone.. two traits i'm not after.. Was wondering if it's ethical for me to continue sexual relations with women in this position.. And/or how you would advise dealing with similar scenarios.. Overall, after trialling out the ideas presented in the OP myself, and it has been my experience that this offer - if honestly proposed with genuine intent on PRESERVING THE FRIENDSHIP FIRST AND FOREMOST - is very ecological for all parties involved.. especially when discussed between two mature, open minded friends.. Blah blah blah.. Rant over.. Respect Flowz..