I think it is not unkind to have a debate, perhaps even a heated and passionate one. People who do it with an intention of being right are going to have a problem though. Those are the ones that resort to personal attacks and character assassination, but they'll learn to shed this negative habit over time, as it only serves to make them feel worse about themselves. If anyone gets into a debate trying to convince others to think their way, they probably aren't ripe for debates. I find that I learn more about myself from engaging in a debate than I do convincing anyone of anything. It's all in good fun.
But your premise is a good one. Choose to be kind rather than be right. Although I prefer how my boyfriend likes to put it: "Allow the other party room to be right." I think it is very kind of me whenever I choose to do that.
