Also wanted to add: your competence isn't the only thing that determines your performance. Sometimes it's just bad luck, sometimes it's the fact that you're imperfect, sometimes it's sheer stupidity on your part, except being stupid is garunteed to be part of your life.
Anyhoo, you might wanna take more time to sort out this stuff, it looks like you're still beating yourself up over being imperfect and not good enough. Inner peace and self-acceptance is just beyond that.
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