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Originally Posted by StevenA  ...and I can't seem to function at the level I used to. She's either here all of the time or the apartment is littered with her stuff and I can't seem to operate. I'm extremely introverted and I want this to work, but for some reason I feel really uncomfortable working around anyone. I've been lagging behind in my daily tasks. Before I was doing about 6-8 hours of tasks set out per day, I'm now getting about 1-2 hours done. I'm spending almost as much time at my computer/instruments though, it's just that I dink around instead of working when my girlfriend is around. She's not intentionally distracting me either, but the fact that she's here seems to be enough to deter me. She is extremely social, and likes to lay on the couch and make conversation. She doesn't have any hobbies of her own other than socializing. I feel like things are going to be even more difficult in a month when we move to an even smaller apartment.
I know the problem and any possible resolutions reside within me, but I'm not really sure why I'm like this in the first place. Has anyone been in my shoes before? |
LOL, yeah. I've been living with my boyfriend for three years and I get nothing done when he's home. He just took a consulting job that's 100% travel, and guess what? For the first time in years, I've consistently gone to the gym, kept the apartment clean, and on the days I work from my home office, I've averaged 8 hours of work per day, a far cry from my usual 3-4 when he's home.
I love him to death, miss him terribly, and we intend to spend our lives together. But it really takes compassion and learning from both of you to figure out how you work best when you're in close proximity. You should be able to work together to create some boundaries; I'm sure she'll understand if you tell her that you lose your concentration when she interrupts you when you're working. Heck, turn it into a compliment. Tell her that she's just so cute that when she says something to you when you're working on the computer, you totally forget what you're supposed to be doing.
And, if at all possible........ don't move into a smaller apartment. It just makes things worse!