[Adam]

Well, I suppose that I should put an update up.

I tried quitting shortly after putting this thread up two months ago... I thought that I would just be stubborn about it, but being stubborn only works when you're doing what you want. I want to not smoke, but I didn't want to go through the process of quitting.

It has been two months since that last try, and I'm trying again. What is different is that, this time, I've done quite a bit of research on what nicotine does to the brain. If anyone is trying to quit, I recommend the links posted in this thread.

So far, I have been quitting for two days. The first day, I had one cigarette at midnight, about 16 hours after starting to quit, and it was a real struggle to go those 16 hours. Now, I'm at my 17th hour after that one cigarette, and it is a lot easier, but still difficult. I've already passed the time since I broke down from yesterday, so now I'm just seeing how far I can get.

One thing that I've noticed is that I can't concentrate very well. I'm always being distracted by the urges, and the addiction is telling me that if I just have a cigarette, all of those distractions will go away and I'll be able to think clearly. Well, I'm not falling for it. If I smoke now, then the last 17 hours of withdrawal will have been wasted, because I'll always have 72 hours of withdrawal from my last cigarette no matter what... Having a cigarette now to get rid of those distractions will be like adding 17 hours on top of those 72 hours.

I can't post in my blog... the only thing that I can do right now is to do mindless things, like play video games, to keep myself distracted without trying to do something that I could be easily distracted from. I want to do something productive, but I can't enter a creative flow state right now, so I'm just sitting here wondering when I'll be clear headed again. I should feel normal by Wednesday, though... that's my goal.