Thank you to all of you. Yesterday I told him I want a separation and he was a bit mad but calmed down and now is doing the I know its for the best and this is right for you and the kids. Hes even admitting that hes done it to the relationship[/I]
He kept being nice and understanding then not in cycles but I spoke to a abuse helpline and they helped me so even tho I have no confidence that this is right and am scared that Im throwing away a chance to be happy Im doing it anyway.
Hope that made sense?!
Hes being nice at the mo about it but I reckon and am going to prepare myself for things to turn nasty when it sinks in that it really IS ending?!!
I cant stay with mum or gparents as they arent really supportive(mum went a bit mad when my dad left her so gparents look after her and i seem to mother her when ever we have contact) my bro is ok but has his own family.
Im ready to face this on my own so to speak just wish I knew it was going to be ok. but I suppose in three months Ill be ok
What the hardest thing is when hes being so nice to describe him and put him down as the horrible abusive man.
But then last night he locked me out of this computer and unplugged the phone. Now this am Im able to use the phone but he unlocks the computer for me and then will lock it again so I cant use it when hes at work.
I know that this is no way for me to live my life nor my kids to see?
Stupidly tho I have a feeling of pity for him as if he is a victim of something that has made him this way and thus makes him angry man but I have to put my kids first and if he wont sort it out and get help, if me and the kids arent worth enough for him to accept his wrongs and try to correct them then I have no other option but to get out.!!
Please keep the words of encouragement (even if they are "cruel to be kind ) as i have drawn so much strength from what has been written already so thanks again.
Especially to Holistic star, reading your story helped so much and I feel comforted that Im not alone!! so thanks.
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