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Originally Posted by Frankthetank  But when you're more evolved like Steve for example this becomes possible and is an attractive option, because you can learn more from different people, and the more people who are in co-creation the more everyone benefits. |
When poly people talk about the intimate connections they want outside of their primary marriage, then say it's NOT about sex and not even necessarily about romance, but about co-creation... that's what stumps me.
See, I had *friendships* that gave all of that. I had issues with a few very jealous and monolithically minded primary partners, but I don't see this as monogamy's fault. These people were already at a fairly low level and probably would've taken the same crap with them into ANY relationship, poly or mono.
I think a lot of our society has disintegrated to the point that people can no longer distinguish between friendship and romance. It's also become difficult for people to have meaningful same-sex friendships.
I have a lot of energy - but I'd rather give it to the projects I want to do, than to a bunch of relationships.
Then again, it may look different when your time is almost totally decoupled from your income, and you're already in a long term relationship that now practically runs itself. And you are already giving a lot of value to the world without having to "work" at it. You have a lot of time to play with.
There is one specific poly dynamic that appeals to me - the cyclical bi poly dynamic that's in the book "The Neanderthal Parallax" where the couple lives with their same sex partner for part of the month and their opposite sex partner for another part of the month. This was absolutely fascinating to me.
I feel weird and threatened by the idea of being with a man though who is seeing other *women*. And men don't tend to be bisexual as often as women do. So, go figure.