First, Lis, I'm sorry for falling out of touch with you. I'm a terrible correspondent; it's something I need to work on.
Second, I'm sorry to see that you are still struggling with this. There is no substitute for willpower, I've discovered. If you can't get all the pieces to line up so that you genuinely want out of the relationship, but you still know that it would be the healthiest choice for your future, you just have to push yourself to go through with it. It's too bad that this has become so drawn out for you. I sincerely wish you the best of luck in finding a more comfortable place for yourself.
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