Quote:
Originally Posted by Angela Leeds  (Rules) They seem like a temporary support, or a technique that could be useful at some point on the continuum. But then there are "grades" after that where one learns how to engage without all of that. Rules help find one's way through a foggy mass of prospective partners, while experienced awareness & intuition help one leap more efficiently "boulder-to-boulder" from one good relationship to the next. |
Absolutely. I outlined in one of my posts that there's a zen approach and a tactical approach. Most people just starting out have too much anxiety and neurosis to possibly be able to do the zen approach - it involves completely letting go of all intention (including marriage and babies) and taking things one moment at a time. We get really good at the tactical approach and master our inner game, then if we're still single by the end of all that we're sufficiently empowered to do zen approach. That's my theory/take on things.
In the TR community I'm in, so much more focus is on Inner Game than on the actual rules - the theory is that if you are already a CUAO then the stuff that's the meat of the rules comes easily. But some of us have to slavishly follow rules to get to that point. I'm into just being a CUAO for its own sake whether I'm dating or not!