I was just pondering what an amazing thing it is to try to get to know someone for relationship reasons, rather than just being friends. You'll want that person to be "right" for you in so many more ways that the filtering by using rules and principles is quite important...so many more pitfalls, too. No wonder people want to have some guidelines. You headed toward intimacy with this person. When you let you guard down, will you be sorry? Sure - we want to protect ourselves.
But the problem lies, I think, when people cling to rules once they're in the relationship because then it's about thoughtful consideration of another person and your individuality and their individuality and seeing them as an archetype "women" or "man" doesn't make for getting closer to that person.
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