I think I can really relate to this, as by reading your post I can almost feel my own pain hiding right beneath the eyes. I have also been directing the pain into other activities such as amine, games, tv, and sleep. These bandages hold back the flood.
Wayne Dyer refers to two quotes (Wisdom of the Ages) that I think may help.
All menís miseries derive from not being able to sit in a quiet room alone. ~ Blaise Pascal
Learn to be silent.
Let your quiet mind listen and absorb.
I recently was forced to go on walk that helped a good deal. I think I need to do more of it. Which reminds me of another quote:
"I have so much to do today, I'll need to spend another hour on my knees." Martin Luther
I love quotes if you can't tell
I've been reading through three books, I've had with me and journalling a lot lately. Peaks and Valleys, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, and Think & Grow Rich. And there have been a lot of good things connecting these books.
Here are some of what I pull away from them.
The Pain of a Valley can awaken you to a truth you've been ignoring.
The way you see the problem is the problem.
The way out of a valley appears when you learn to see things differently.
What is the truth about the situation? Use reality as your friend. See it as it is, but not worse than it is.
There is more, but it feels like my tiredness is showing more than I expected. But overall, I recommend, going someplace to be alone, with no distractions, and maybe take a long a few really good, probing questions. Another thing that has helped me lately is to forgive myself. For not yet being exceptional in the eyes of the world, as I wish to be. For not being financially free, successful, perfect/ideal relationship, fit and healthy, whatever else I think should be different from what it is now.
Its tough, and I wish you well. If you find something that helps and works for you, I'd welcome it.