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Originally Posted by seeker5  Ah. Well, I was thinking of a situation I was in that was a romantic relationship. |
That makes sense. Relationship / romantic stuff can definitely play with your head, bigtime.
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Originally Posted by seeker5 It's not that they are holding me back, it's more that I've kept having these negative thoughts about what she believes about me and I started doing the works last night and I realized that those things she believed about me were things I believed about me. |
Sure. Insecurities basically.
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Originally Posted by seeker5 Then today I realized even more things that I believed that I actually agree, and that's why it would bothers me so much. And then talking to Aspiring about the things she believes about her boyfriend and how it's a reflection of what she believes about herself and she confirmed that so it was just further showing cementing my thinking on this. |
So even though she might not have been thinking any of that stuff at all, insecurities you are holding onto are still coming out. Nothing like a new relationship / crush / dating to do that.
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Originally Posted by seeker5 For example, to extrapolat that to work. If you feel you're a loser at a certain field (and you hate yourself for being such a loser at it instead of being accepting of being a newbie), and someone tells you you're a loser, then you're likely going resonate with that and get angry at the person. In truth, you're angry at them for showing the way you truly feel about yourself. Because if in truth you felt you were a winner and a great person in that field, then if they told you that you were a loser, it wouldn't resonate with you. |
Yep, exactly. In my experience people who are very outgoing and chipper at work usually get promoted faster for just that reason.
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Originally Posted by seeker5 To me, I've tended to get away from people whom I felt would have these negative beliefs about me. This is showing me that no, the answer is not to run away from them, but to thank them (at least in my head) for making me aware of something I may have been avoiding. And if I already knew about it, then i can thank them for reminding me to do something about this negative self-belief.  . Sometimes I get lazy and don't deal with a negative self-belief I need to work on, and getting reminded with a painful experience like that can be great to help me get off my butt and moving on it. |
It depends if A: the beliefs are accurate and B: these are things that you are wanting to change about yourself?