First of all, you need to process all that stuff from your ex - she gave you a complex. For all you know, she was just hurt and lashing out and none of it could be true. She kept having sex with you, didn't she? Was she SO inexperienced or had so little confidence that she *never* took the upper hand, and/or told you/showed you what she liked? She was just being spiteful.
That said, it can't hurt to learn more about sexual techniques. You really should learn to use every other part of your body. Learn to use your hands and mouth more. If you're big enough for penetration, save that for very last - the cherry on top of the sundae - after she's already had a few O's. If you're not, well - she can use her hands and mouth, too. You can even branch out and use toys, and educate yourself about different positions. There are different positions where a smaller guy can get deeper/get more friction.
Experiment with different ways to get and give pleasure, too. Fully explore your OWN body, I really like the books by Betty Dodson - google those. Listen to your partner about what she likes and have her show you when you first start getting together. Take your time to fully explore each other's bodies (you know, like most of us do as teenagers with the first partner).
Finally, not everybody can have sex with everybody else without some "hacks" involved; not everybody is physically compatible. This is one of those mistakes you see about sex in the movies.
Seriously. Plenty of lesbians have plenty of good sex without a penis ever being involved. The only thing that's an issue here is your ego and sense of manhood connected with your penis. Your ex attacked that, and you're still smarting.
But if you really become a dynamite lover, no woman will ever complain about what equipment you do or don't have, unless she's just being a ♥♥♥♥♥.
At least you can rule that out, and in the end say, "Hey, you never complained!"
Finally:
Quote:
Originally Posted by {aspiring_to_clarity}  I know it's not exactly the same seeing as breasts aren't needed to perform a sexual act, but mine are tiny. |
Had to jump in on this one - I'd give anything to be able to actually sleep on my stomach, and to ACTUALLY HAVE MEN LOOK ME IN THE EYE. Worst of all I'm active. I'd rather be able to have a chest that fits the rest of my body and my lifestyle than have what I have. The kind of guys I'd want to go with, don't like my body type. I've known a lot of guys now who prefer smaller chested women because they stereotype bigger chested women as being inactive and assume they don't do sports.
Just pointing this out to say that there's a cost and benefit for every body type.