Originally Posted by seeker5
I went with the group that did free hugs today. It was so much fun.
Even though these people holding the free hugs were getting rejected by probably 80-95% of the people walking by, because there was so many people walking by (this was a very very very busy sidewalk), they were still getting so many hugs. (...) "who the hell am I to hold that sign - I can't let people think I expect them to want to give me a hug"
The way you talk about it, to me it sounds like you're seeing the "free hugs" thing as a way of getting
hugs. Maybe it would be easier for you to overcome your fear if you saw it as a way of giving
hugs to others.
This way, the people holding a sign don't "get" hugs, they give them. They don't "get rejected", people simply don't take their offer. You don't feel rejected when you're a clerk in a shop and someone doesn't buy anything, right?
And this way you wouldn't let people know that you expect them to want to "give you a hug", you let them simply know that if they
want to be hugged, then you are ready to give
them a hug.
That's a big, big difference!
it's dangerous for me to show that I might expect others to care for me, or to show affection such as by hugging me. |
I'm sure you can bypass this limiting belief by focusing on showing affection to others
by hugging them
. In such a case, it's totally not relevant whether they hug you or not, it won't hurt you, because it's not about them caring for you, it's about you caring for them.
Outwards instead of inwards.