[Angela]

Originally Posted by seeker5

So basically Angela, the only reason you're into unconditional love is because it feels good for you, not because of anything it does for others?

It's all tied up together. When you generate a state of being that feels good, you generate it for yourself, for your friends, for the world.

I see from what you're saying here, that for you unconditional love is not something you have for someone, but rather it's a state you generate of being.

Yes.

So, a mother who loves her child unconditionally, but doesn't love other people doesn't really love her child unconditionally? I know someone who loves almost everyone unconditionally, except she can't love certain gruesome criminals unconditionally - does that mean she doesn't truly love all those other people unconditionally? I find that hard to believe.

Sure, the love she has for her handpicked people (or the love a mother has for her child) can be truly unconditional. But that's not unconditional love as a state of being, because there is a condition involved: you must be one of the chosen people or I will not love you. Certain gruesome criminals need not apply. That's conditional love, as a state of being, and it doesn't mean that there are conditions for you loving any particular person, e.g. your own kid. (who is hopefully not a gruesome criminal -- that would be hard.)

Your definition of unconditional love is different from what I hear other people, including in this thread talk about. You seem to talk of unconditional love as something you are, whereas others seem to talk about something you do to someone. Am I wrong?

No, I'd say that's correct.

Yeah, so you love someone unconditionally, but no way you'd want them over for dinner. I dunno, I feel I'd rather have someone who doesn't love me, but who'd love to have me over for dinner compared to someone who loves me unconditionally but doesn't want to eat dinner with me.

It sounds like love, for you, equals wanting to spend time with you (or have dinner with you), is that right? Like, what kind of love is this if you don't want to eat with me? In that case I can see where hearing about love that doesn't involve a shared meal (shared time together) would strike you as false or offensive. It does actually sound to me like you are getting emotionally reactivated by this conversation, is that so? This last paragraph you wrote sounds a little snide to me -- like my perspective of unconditional love pisses you off. Is that right?