Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post - Initiating Relationships with Openness, Honesty, and Directness (Blog)

simplyberry · 01-22-2009, 06:07 AM

When you've been around as long as I have(0ver 50 years and counting near 60) and through a divorce, a deceased spouse, caretaker for children, you realize honesty is the best policy in any relationship. This doesn't mean just honesty after " the relationship" has been established; but also "before and during the courtship period"; it also means honesty in self exploration of your goals and values and determining it's beneficial to be in a relationship and if so with who.

If for some reason you have not done the self exploration and made a mistake; it is "honest" to express if you are willing to work on your communication or even access if you should even be together and "end it". It is in the best interest of children for them to be with parents who have no "secrets" to hide and are in open communication with their children on how their parents issues will affect their need to feel safe and secure.

If you are truly honest, then you will set up an environment where your children (if of age) can express if your behaviors nurture them and makes them feel safe.

Honesty--a given. And the willingness to hear honesty from your children: a given also.

01-22-2009, 06:07 AM	#4 (permalink)
simplyberry Junior Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 11	Personal Relationships When you've been around as long as I have(0ver 50 years and counting near 60) and through a divorce, a deceased spouse, caretaker for children, you realize honesty is the best policy in any relationship. This doesn't mean just honesty after " the relationship" has been established; but also "before and during the courtship period"; it also means honesty in self exploration of your goals and values and determining it's beneficial to be in a relationship and if so with who. If for some reason you have not done the self exploration and made a mistake; it is "honest" to express if you are willing to work on your communication or even access if you should even be together and "end it". It is in the best interest of children for them to be with parents who have no "secrets" to hide and are in open communication with their children on how their parents issues will affect their need to feel safe and secure. If you are truly honest, then you will set up an environment where your children (if of age) can express if your behaviors nurture them and makes them feel safe. Honesty--a given. And the willingness to hear honesty from your children: a given also.