Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Chui  |
Interesting. Reading that gave me an epiphany. "The Rules" seems to have more in common with how a courtesan would operate, than how a woman would traditionally get a husband in many cultures and even many American subcultures. The Rules wasn't written for churchgoing working class women or even Middle America types. It was written for women who want to marry men who are professionals. Rulesgirls don't actually hold out for marriage or even engagement. They play the sex game with a set of rules... after the third date, his place not yours, and leave first (make him chase you down if he wants to have breakfast together).
"The Rules" is predicated on the idea that upper class men these days look for a legally sanctioned courtesan relationship rather than a traditionally defined marriage. "The Rules" has very little to do with dating customs of working class people or religious communities.
It's amusing to see people here really make a study of the Don Juans and Casanovas of the world while forgetting about their female counterpart, the Madame de Pompadours of the world.
I had more issues with "player" collisions when doing The Rules than when not doing any special technique at all. The players know how to play The Rules better than the sincere men do. Trying to do The Rules around a bunch of nerds/geeks is an exercise in futility. Every subculture has its own rules.
My criticism of The Rules is that it's a double edged sword and it can end up playing right into the same predatory hands that the woman is trying to manipulate.
Rulesgirls have as much derision for AFCs as PUAs do; in Rules terminology they're called "moonpies".
I have really got to make a side-by-side comparison of all the Rules/PUA techniques and the terms they use.
The only reason this doesn't seem to apply much anymore is because the Rules have become kind of passe, the Rules subculture has diminished and the online communities are less active,
and a number of other books have come along since, that are more popular... though every single one has ridden on the coattails of that book.
But damn, if PUA and Rules aren't practically identical. The only real difference is that PUAs are trying to get sex and Rulesgirls are trying to get married. They mean different things by closing the deal. For a RG to "close the deal" means either engagement in a year or dump him.
But damn if they don't play right into each other's hands. I think I found one of those natural enemy relationships. If only "Nature" wanted to cover this.