Thanks for so many great replies. Ixmatus' was wonderful, I can empathize with the 'heartwrenching' gut emotion, sometimes emotions just can't be rationalized, you definitely put it into perspective for me. However, I think missing's response about me having preset negative assumptions is a little harsh & off. Though it was a really good point, that was not how our situation was at all. He had more sexual partners (5/2) than I had while I was away so I don't think that the quantity was the issue. And in my opinion the ego is the source of negativity especially if it negatively affects your mentality and relationships. I think if a couple's relationship isn't deep and honest, then having multiple partners would be a very bad idea, but if you consider tour partner as precisely that, your partner, someone who was on your side who would never want to hurt you then I don't see why something like sex & relationships with other people would be as big of a deal. Of course I think there is something extremely attractive & romantic in monogamy, it definitely strokes the ego to be someone's one and only, to be wanted above the rest, however, this feeling I think, can still be attained in a poly relationship if it were truthful. Anyways, thanks for the really great insight. It was extremely interesting especially shy talk's theory about why women are sluts whereas the male equivalent are studs. It is definitely easier for women to have sex, however, to think of women as sluts because they have it biologically/culturally easier than men sounds like patriarchal thinking stemming from jealousy. To reenforce these unfair beliefs does not sound conscious to me.
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